Short jokes
A blind man walked into me at a store. I said, "Watch it, bitch!" and he said, "Sorry, I didn't see you there."
Me: Have you ever went sky diving?
Friend: No.
Me: Well don't, it sucks.
Friend: Why?
Me: They gave me a parachute and I lived.
What did my grandpa say after he kicked the bucket?
Nothing, I unplugged his life support before he said a word.
Teacher: Take a seat, class.
Wheelchair person: I've been in the seat.
A person with a wheelchair makes a joke. No one laughs.
Inner thought: "Wheely Manerva, wheely."
People with wheelchairs listen to "Rolling in the Deep" by Adele.
My friend Nickiya wanted to know what animal she'd be. I said that she would be a "Ni-cat-a."
Have you heard about the smart traveler? He's clearly going places.
The sexual shout "Yes Daddy" probably originated in Alabama.
Shut the hell up with all these Stephen Hawking jokes, hahah. I wanna kms.
Hola.
I'm sorry for your loss.
It is going tibia okay.
Why was the cow scared? Cause he had a nightmoo-r.
Only one of Kenny's girlfriends has ever said he's good in bed.
But she has to. She's his mom.
What do cows call money?
Moola.
Why was Stephen Hawking late to the NASA meeting?
He couldn't get up the kerb.
Your cow is so ugly, it scared the crap out of the toilet!
What do you call a hill with cows on it?
A Moo-ntain.
My friend asks for a turkey burger on 4th of July. I say, "That's Thanksgiving, man!"
What do you do when you made a misteak?
You do some yoga 🧘♀️ and say, "Namaaa steak."