Short jokes
Yo mama's so ugly, she went into a haunted house......
And came back out with a job application, then that ran away *CAUSE SHE'S A UGLY FUCK*
Your mama so fat, when she put a leg in the car, the wheels deflated.
My hair strainer is hotter than you.
My girlfriend is so fat, she looked into the mirror and said, "Woah, there are two of me!"
The other day, my wife asked me to pass her lipstick, but I accidentally passed her a glue stick. She still isn’t talking to me.
Why do I have the urge to stick a chicken wing up yo pussy?
What do you call a crazy-in-every-way sister?
A sissy.
I got stuck in the dryer again. Brother, say less.
Hey, look, it's Uranus coming from the sky!
A man can form Jupiter girls came from Venus, and other genders came right from Uranus.
The other day my brother hit me. I yelled for mom. No one responded.
The other day my mom called me a retard.
I'm now an orphan.
Knock knock.
Orphan: Who's there?
Not your parents.
My sister asked me what is dark humor. I asked what does a cannibal call a pregnant woman? "Kinder Surprise!"
Yo mama's so fat, she woke up on both sides of the bed.
Yo mama so fat when she laid on a water bed, she laid on the whole Pacific Ocean.
I'm jealous of my LED lights, 'cause they're hanging from the ceiling and I'm not.
Why did the director have an injured leg? Cause he couldn't find the right cast.
Did the leaf or the emo fall out of the tree? The leaf won. The rope stopped the emo.
A teacher says, "What comes before 47?" Quiet kid: "AK!"