Short jokes

I am like Cookie Monster on steroids when it comes to cookies.

Guys, we shouldn't make jokes about 9/11. My dad was a victim.

He was the best pilot in Arab.

Me: I'm home, ma! Here's her with a new dad. Her: Go hang with someone. Me: Gets the noose, goes to fav tree. I love you, ma. 🙂

I farted, try me. You farted? Oh no, we all farted.

The plane crashed, but I did too on a pillow.

What do you call a lesbian alien? A "lesbeening."

What’s the difference between 69 and High School?

In 69 you usually only kiss one c*nt and look at one a**hole.

My sister's friends are hilarious, like seriously, haha.

Yo mama so fat, when she said, "I want a boat," they gave her a naval ship.

Imagine everyone being hoes.

I saw an orphan fall in the street crying, so I ran up to him and said, "Are you okay? Where are your parents?"

"Gwen, this was a fake look in the comments!"

Why does an orphan always try to escape the orphanage?

Because he wants to get money to buy a family since they won't buy him.

Hey selfish king, I see you need a girlfriend ;)

Vote Biden or Trump, I like neither, but I want to know what the world would say. (Don't judge other people.)

I fucked your mum last night, that she was salty.

Need for seed.

When they say beat that pussy, I don’t play so punch it.

Why'd Susie go down the slide too fast?

Because her wheelchair was good.

What's the difference between my mum and my dad?

My mum stayed.

What can a duck eat for a snack? Saltine quackers!