Shit Jokes

Timmy:*grabs box of trojans* Daddy:... Timmy: Well come on diddy! Daddy: Well shit lets go son! Both: YEE YEE

SWEET HOME ALABAMA

ICEBERG.you may know me Titanic.you are a sucker Iceberg. You hit me Titanic.moron Iceberg.waaaaaaaaaa Titanic.I don’t give a shit

when a white person says the n word

black people: yall mother fu...rs aint gonna believe dis shit

Me: the man sleeped in a $200 bed i He's hole life so why dose he need a $2,000 coughing My friend: there cheaper at Costco Me: oh shit your going to have "fun" this weekend

Anonymous
01/22/20(Wed)02:16:13 No.819003901
I just got released from prison. Four years. I robbed a
fucking bank but plead down to aggravated assault.
Money's gone. Fucking dye packs. Oh well, could
have been 20 so no complaints.
Now what do? Drive a truck?
>>819004027 # >>819004077 # >>819004321 # >>819014798 #
: Anonymous
>>819003901 #
Here's what you do
>start youtube channel
>your very first video is going to be you sitting in front
of a high quality camera looking presentable
>half the screen is going to show a videogame
>title of the youtube video: "REAL Bank Robber
Critiques GTA5 Bank Heist Mission"
01/22/20(Wed)02:26:13 No.819004321
>you're gonna commentate over the gta5 intro and
say shit like "yeah thats pretty realistic they'd have
alarms like that"
>pause the cutscene every now and then and say
some shit like "back when i hit the bank, the cops
were on us much quicker than this, so im not sure
this is entirely accurate"
>your next videos are going to be you critiquing
similar scenes from other games or movies
>then your videos are going to be QandA about
prison life
>before you know it you're at 350k subs and growing
and all you do is talk into a camera about prison
>enjoy making more money than all of us

Pov:You start writing son lyrics because you can't stand up for yourself knowing you've lost

Well shit.

You want a conspiracy theory, well I will give
you a conspiracy theory:
311

Why do Inbred White Trash Racists talk so much Shit?

Answer; Because deep down inside, they KNOW that they are nothing but PATHETIC LOSERS!

"LOVE YOUR
NEIGHBOR AS
YOURSELF"
YOU FUCKING
MORON
HELLO
NEIGHBOR
YOU WORTHLESS
PIECE OF HUMAN
SHIT
BY EXTRA FABULOUS COMICS FOR Cyanide and Happiness Explosm.net

Q: What did Tim say when his girlfriend fell down a rabbit hole? A: Hole-y shit!

yo mama so stupid that she shit and farted on you asshole

Why Belgians don’t eat shit sandwich? They don’t fancy bread!

Holy fucking shit Addison watersharky Gwen and all of you other cringelords I swear to god I I hear one more thing about “please be kind no bullying on the internet” I will actually shoot my local school. You may not know since you are only 8yrs old or whatever but the world is not kind. It’s full of sick people out to beat others and the only way to stay safe is to beat them. So even if you think you are spreading kindness it’s just gonna make you a target. So just stfu and keep your “please be kind “messages to yourselves