Shit jokes

Wanna hear a joke?

Your face.

Grammar: It's the difference between knowing your shit and knowing you're shit.

you.

I went to the zoo the other day. The only animal there was a dog. It was a Shih-tzu (shit zoo).

Did you hear about the gays that had a baby? It was a little shit

There were once three brothers, Shit, Shut up, and Manners. One day, Shit got hit by a car. Shut up went to find help at the local police station while Manners tried to help Shit.

When Shut up got to the police station he says, "My brother has just been hit by a car."

The policeman replied with, "OK then, first I need to know your name."

"Shut up."

"No, I need to know your name."

"Shut up."

"Excuse me, but where are your manners?"

"Round the corner picking up shit."

A cop pulls a guy over for suspected drunk driving. The cop opens the door and the driver falls out onto the asphalt. The cop says, "Holy shit, you're so drunk, you can't even walk!"

The drunk says, "No shit, that's why I took my car!"

Chuck Norris doesn't flush the toilet.

He scares the shit out of it.