She jokes
My wife told me to pass her some chapstick, but then I realized she hasn’t talked to me in a month, then remembering I gave her super glue.........ehh I’m done with her big ass mouth.
Yo mom is so fat that when she stands on a scale, she broke it, lol.
Yo momma so slutty, when she got a throat swab, the lab found eight different types of semen on her tonsils.
Yo mama so FAT, she can't handle files bigger than 4 GB.
Yo mama so fat, she costs 15 elixir, and 3 inferno towers can't kill her!
My sister is the weird dark one and emo of the family. I'm the bright happy one. Once in 3rd grade, I got a huge A on mine, and my sis got a D-.
In the playground near a tree, we were sitting and playing. I said, "Hey, a C- is not that bad," and raised my hand up to give her a high five, but she left me hanging.
I asked a Chinese girl her number, she said "Sex, sex, sex, free sex tonight." I said, "Wow!"
Her friend corrected her by saying, "She means: 666-3629."
I saw a kid crying, so I asked them, "Where are your parents?" Then she cried harder, so I left the orphanage.
How did Helen Keller lose her virginity?
I told her the plunger was stuck in the toilet, but she didn’t listen...
What's 12 inches long, red, and when I force feed it to my wife, she cries?
Her miscarriage.
Your mom's so poor, she chased the garbage truck with her grocery list.
I told my sister I was into incest. She took it really hard. 😉😏
I watched a potato farmer get arrested the other day.
She kept yelling, "Do you know who I yam?"
How do you know if a woman that is poor who is between 18-24 years old is poor enough to do anything for money to help pay her bills? She would be working as a lesbian prostitute inside a lesbian hotel in San Francisco, CA.
My pregnant wife said we were gonna name the kid Digiorno. She wouldn't tell me why until she got an abortion and told me, "It's not delivery, it's Digiorno."
My sister told me only onions make you cry, so I always hit her back when she hit me, but I hit her with a shoe only to catch her cry.
My wife walked in on me cheating on her and said, "How could you cheat on me?!" I said, "She was lying naked on the table what I was supposed to do?" and my wife responded with, "Perform the autopsy."
Your mama's so fat, when she went to the movies, she sat next to everyone.
Yo mama is so ugly, she turned a knife into a statue.
Yo mamma is so dumb that she smokes to burn calories!