Sex

Sex jokes

Job

    • When I was walking home, a couple of married guys were saying, "Your mom is good at her job," but I realized my mom doesn't work.

    So I ask my mom, "Why are these guys saying you're good at your job? You don't work." My mom said, "Yeah, I got a new job." So I said, "What do you do?" My mom said, "Job hand, no, I mean it's called a hand job."

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    • Guy

    • You want to hear a dirty joke?

    This guy and this girl were having sex when the guy's boss called to ask why he wasn't at work. The guy responds, "I'm sick." His boss replies, "You don't sound sick." The guy says, "I'm fucking my sister" and hangs up the phone.

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    • Incest

    • When you are f***ing your girlfriend and then she tells you that you f**k like your guys' dad.

    Then you f**k your mom and she says the same thing.

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    • Doctor

    • My doctor is a very attractive woman; gorgeous face, nice boobs, smoking hot body. She said to me, “You are in your 50’s now, you have GOT to stop masturbating.” I asked why. She replied, “Because I’m trying to examine you, ya’ pervert!!!”

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    • Teacher

    • The teacher asks her class, "What is sex?" and Little Jonny stands up and says, "Sex is the temptation caused by the sensation when a boy sticks his location into a girl's destination. Did you get my explanation or do you need a demonstration?" and the teacher fainted.

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    • Mum

    • Ur mum smells like shit, yeah, so she sucks a man off and washing machine. Yo, don’t at me, yeah, you chicken breath.

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    • Marijuana

    • Jack and Jill went up a hill to smoke some marijuana. Jack got high, pulled down his fly, and said, "Jill do you wanna?" Jill said yes, pulled up her dress, and then they had some fun. But stupid Jill forgot the pill so now they have a son.

    Penis

    • Jack and Jill ran up the hill to pop some pills,

    And Jill said, "Jack can do her without here will," and Jack's penis was still.

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