Self Harm jokes

So, a few hours ago my friend said I need to CUT it out with the s/h jokes... like... it's really not that deep?

Why don’t emo girls go to self checkout?

Because every time they scan, it scans twice.

My friend asked, "What's that on your arm?" I replied, "Oh, this? I didn't have enough storage on my phone to download Fruit Ninja so I had to improvise a little bit."

Friend: “What's that on your arm?”

Me: “Oh, nothing. Just decided I wanted to cosplay a tiger.”

I started debating whether or not suicide is a good option. Self-harm just hasn’t been cutting it lately.

To whoever you are, you are loved.

People keep telling me that I should stop making sh jokes... bro it's not that deep.

Why do self-harmers "draw" on their arms?

Because everything they do is in vein.

Punchline: "Vain" sounds similar to "Vein".

I got them red Gucci bracelets.

"What happened to your arm?" "Oh, uh... I became a gacha emo."

Any girl can be a squirter if you hit the right artery.

Grew up playing Fruit Ninja on my iPad. Spent time with my online sister playing multiplayer.

Now I play it in school with an awesome small steel blade.

I’m not allowed my phone during school hours and I have to give it in at the start of the day...

I know what I want to be for Halloween! A pumpkin! I'm very good at carving into myself, after all.

Someone said to stop hurting myself, but I'm still trying to cut my arms off.

If you slit your wrist while crying in pain, that's self-harm.

If you slit your wrist but have no expression, that's acting.

It isn't any of those if it's suicide.

My parents were concerned when I said I like to bleed, but at least I cut my risk of cancer and stroke in half.

I told my dad I was self harming. The next day we talked about it and he said, "Hey you should CUT it out." It was funny but I couldn't bring myself to laugh at that.

When I self-harmed one day, my mother told me that it cut her deep. We both found that very amusing.

Instead of Edward Scissorhands, I’m Edwardscissor wrists.

My arms are just a different texture pack compared to my body.

My friend told me my wrist wasn't a cutting board. So I asked her if hers was at all, and if I could borrow it.