I’ve always been a bit insecure about having thicker thighs.
Now I realize it allows me to fit more scars!
My dad’s nickname for me is ‘Tiger’.
Now, my wrists look like a tiger.
Why are there so many scars and cuts on your arm?
Because it's a battlefield.
Friend: "UR LIT BRO!!"
Me: "That's what my sleeve said to my arm."
The match: "Ur my match." The thighs: "You light me up."
If you want to SH but not in the sell farm way, come ooon.. do you even know what does that means?..
Wanna hear somethin' ironic?
When one cutter tells another cutter to stop, but he himself can't stop cutting.
My joke is:
MY LIFE
Do you know why I wish grass was emo? So it can cut itself.
What part do people slit the most?
Everyone.
I only cut to find out if I'm real or cake.
My thighs have a different texture pack than the rest of me.
what's flat and great for cutting? me.
Why should you be friends with emos? Because you get to scan their bar code for 20% off, and when it expires, they get rid of themselves.
What does my arm have in common with paper?
They both can be cut.
I’m becoming a litter bit more zebra everyday.
Why do cats leave scratches on arms? They don't; I do it myself.
What’s the easiest way to dig a hole to china?
Through my arm
A robber held up a depressed kid at gun point.
The depressed kid took the gun, and said, "I'll do it myself."
How did the man with no arms commit suicide?
We'll never know - he didn't leave a note.
