Self Harm jokes
Why do self-harmers "draw" on their arms?
Because everything they do is in vein.
Punchline: "Vain" sounds similar to "Vein".
Therapist: What do you want to do when you grow up?
Me: Oh, I wan-
Therapist: Don’t say to be dead.
Me: Well, I want to be an entrepreneur. I want to sell land, pencils, oh yeah. I also want to sell farm.
My dad’s nickname for me is ‘Tiger’.
Now, my wrists look like a tiger.
I searched up self harm jokes, clean, but I couldn't find any :[
Why don’t emo girls go to self checkout?
Because every time they scan, it scans twice.
when you don't have a phone to play Fruit Ninja and improvise.
My best friend looked at my arms and said, "Stop, sh*t, it's bad," then turns right around and says, "You look like a tiger."
So from here on out I am now Finn, the self-harming tiger.
The match: "Ur my match." The thighs: "You light me up."
My heart says to stop because it hurts.
Bro, chill. It's really not that deep.
I don't need to go to the car dealership when I have a Geico scanner on my arm at all times. 😏
I now know what my first tattoo should be, zebra stripes! Not like anyone would know the difference between them.
What's the difference between my arm and my stomach? My stomach isn't ripped.
What is red and looks like a zebra?
My arm. Hehhehehehe UwU
I told someone some jokes, y'know? "Fruit Ninja," "barcode legs," "French puppet thigh wrings." And she was like saying that's not cool and stuff. So she reported me, and it was like:
The counselor: "So I've heard you've been making sh jokes?" Me: "You say it like it's a bad thing." Her: "It is." Me: "Chill bro, it ain't that deep. Don't worry I'll end it :)"
"what's that on your wrist?"
"I'm a cutting board. duh"
My joke is:
My life.
Friend: Did your tattoos hurt?
Me: Nah, not really.
Friend: What did they feel like?
Me: 7th grade.
Friend: 😶😶😨😰😰😰😨
Why are there so many scars and cuts on your arm?
Because it's a battlefield.
What is a self-harm person's favorite game?
Fruit Ninja.
what's flat and great for cutting? me.