See jokes

Q: Wanna see something funny?

A: Sure.

*bomb Florida*

Me: Can I borrow your CD?

Friend: What CD?

Me: See deez nuts in your mouth.

A German soldier was walking down the street in a hail storm and a woman got hit unconscious. He ran over to see if she was ok. Other people came running over. They asked what happened, and the German soldier said, "Hail hit her."

If this is offensive to anyone, I'm sorry! Hey, wanna see something funny? Go look in your mirror!

Son: Daddy, what's dark humor?

Dad: See that man over there with no arms or legs? Go tell him to stand up and clap.

Son: But Daddy, I'm blind.

Dad: Exactly.

Why did the chicken cross the road?

To see his friend.

Knock knock.

Who's there?

The chicken.

Yo mama is so fat, I thought she was a beach whale.

When a person asked to see her balance at a bank, they pushed him over.

When your friend gets involved with someone, it affects the friendship. Whenever a friend of mine has a new girlfriend, we should say I looked like the person you used to know, but I've been modified to survive in this relationship. If we have an argument and she's there, I might disagree with you; I'd rather continue to see her naked.

You know, that I see my sister at home from school. She says everyone bullies me. I say, "Because you're a fat a**."

Why do you have to pay to see Russian people?

Because the zoo is not free, Duhhhhh🙄

A blind woman told her husband someone is coming. He asks how do you know, you can't see. She replies, "I can taste it."

Your mom is so ugly her face would split in half when she sees you.

If you want to see what I look like, then pics will be coming soon!

But freshfry, how are you!

Oh, and this is Cassie, aka princess shortie!

Here's a tip for cow tipping from TheRussianBadger.

"So if you see Otis from Barnyard, make sure you blast his ass from a distance!"

What does "off-limits" have in common with dead people? They can’t see their family.

Knock, knock.

Who's there?

You.

You who?

Who do you see over there???

What do dead people and orphans have in common? They can't see their family.

I'm on a seafood diet. I see food and eat it.

A man sees a girl crying and asks her what's wrong.

The girl replied, "Everyone keeps making fun of me."

"You should tell your parents," I replied back.

The girl started crying even more. That's when I got confused and left the orphanage.