Sea jokes
Why did the ocean break up with the pond?
Because the pond was too shallow.
Why does it take so long for the pirates to learn the alphabet?
Because they spend years on C! Pirate: A, B, sea?
I tried a pun about water, but people "sea" right through it, and when people complain, they are usually just being a beach.
What does the cent say when it says hello? It waves.
Your hairline parts faster than Moses parting the Red Sea.
Why was the kid's report card all wet?
Because it was below "sea" level.
What kind of hair do oceans have? Wavy.
Why do seagulls fly over the sea?
Because if they flew over the bay, they would be called bagels.
People were scared of the alligator because it ate everyone, so they called for the water god Aquarius.
He said "Sea ya later, alligator!" and he drowned.
What do you call the mushy stuff between sharks' teeth?
A slow swimmer...
What comes up on small oceans? Microwaves.
A lawyer bought a beautiful yacht. He invited the law firm to come aboard for a great weekend.
Saturday night was the candle light dinner and Sam drank too much, walked on the deck and fell over the rail into the water and was calling for help. Tom said, "Oh no, the sharks will get him." All of the party lined along the rail and noticed the sharks were swimming around him in a circle. Jim said, "The sharks are not even bothering him!" And a shark lifted up his head out of the water and said, "Professional Courtesy."
Why was the sea sad? Because it was blue.
What do you call male mermaids?
Mer-butlers!
Why did the mermaid want to go to the evil monster so it could get a real joke? Ha, ah, ah, ha!
Well, we started off by ripping up ALL of the decking.
Abandon ship!
What do you call a deep diver? A DeepWoken player.
A... B... Sea?
It's tricky when you're both a moth and a sea captain in charge of a ship, but up ahead, you see a lighthouse.
What do you call a whale on a beach?
Banked.