Sea jokes
What do mermaids put in the salads?
Sea cucumber.
you.
Why did the mermaid want to go to the evil monster so it could get a real joke? Ha, ah, ah, ha!
Hey Jorden Calerendiá, your last name sounds like a sea food shop that I get my fish from.
Your roasting is trash just like you. Boy, stop roasting on Addison and Gwen and others; you're probably 5 years old trying to dislike that. That roasting is like from 1920, get a life.
What did the pirate say when he saw a ghost? He said, "Oh my God, it's me dead parrot!"
What did the shark say when he ate the clownfish?
"This tastes a little funny."
Why did Michael Jackson go to Sea World?
To free Willie.
[God creating a jellyfish]
God: How about an evil bag?
What do you call male mermaids?
Mer-butlers!
What's the difference between a piano and a fish? You can tune a piano, but you can't tuna fish!
Why didn't the boy want to read "2000 Leagues Under the Sea"?
It was too much pressure.
Why do pirates pirate? Because they "Arrrrrrrrrgggghhh!" Hahahahahahahahaha!
What part of the Earth does Helen Keller not have?
The sea.
A is for Amy who fell down the stairs.
B is for Basil assaulted by bears.
C is for Clara who wasted away.
D is for Desmond thrown out of a sleigh.
E is for Ernest who choked on a peach.
F is for Fanny sucked dry by a leech.
G is for George smothered under a rug.
H is for Hector done in by a thug.
I is for Ida who drowned in a lake.
J is for James who took lye by mistake.
K is for Kate who was struck with an axe.
L is for Leo who swallowed some tacks.
M is for Maud who was swept out to sea.
N is for Neville who died of ennui.
O is for Olive run through with an awl.
P is for Prue trampled flat in a brawl.
Q is for Quentin who sank in a mire.
R is for Rhoda consumed by a fire.
S is for Susan who perished of fits.
T is for Titus who flew into bits.
U is for Una who slipped down a drain.
V is for Victor squashed under a train.
W is for Winnie embedded in ice.
X is for Xerxes devoured by mice.
Y is for Yorick whose head was knocked in.
Z is for Zillah who drank too much gin.
What is a pirate's favorite ride? A carrr!
What is shark's favorite day?
Chewsday.
A lawyer bought a beautiful yacht. He invited the law firm to come aboard for a great weekend.
Saturday night was the candle light dinner and Sam drank too much, walked on the deck and fell over the rail into the water and was calling for help. Tom said, "Oh no, the sharks will get him." All of the party lined along the rail and noticed the sharks were swimming around him in a circle. Jim said, "The sharks are not even bothering him!" And a shark lifted up his head out of the water and said, "Professional Courtesy."
What did the whale say?
Nothing!
It just wailed.
Yo mama so fat, she the reason why Moses split the Red Sea.
How much do pirate earrings cost? 🤔
Answer: A buck an ear. 🤣