Science jokes
How does the earth rate its sex?
Earthquake, Cataclysm, Volcano explosion, Earth's core explodes.
If the earth's core explodes, then he got tore up!
Why is Pluto a dwarf planet?
Because it looks like a g-nome.
How do you embarrass a female archaeologist?
Give her a used tampon and ask which period it came from.
"Stephen Hawking was talking about a cash register at Costco when he said I can’t stand these people. 😳😳😳😳😳😳 What did he saaaaaaayyyyyyy?"
Why was Stephen Hawking good at football? Because he is a pro dribbler.
It's okay to tell a Stephen Hawking joke if there are stairs in your house he can't get to you. Plus, he shut himself down, so it's all good :)
Your mama is so fat, when scientists discovered her, they thought it was a new galaxy.
What does Stephen Hawking have in common with Bill Gates? One stands, the other doesn't.
A neutron walks into a bar and asks the bartender, "How much for a drink?"
The bartender responds, "For you, no charge."
What's the difference between Stephen Hawking and a tap?
The tap can run.
In my science class we were watching a video, and for no reason at all, it started talking about Black Lives Matter, and my friend leaned over and whispered, “White lives matter more!”
An orphan walks into a science lab. The lead scientist greets him and takes him to a DNA testing station. After some procedures, the results come back:
"UNKNOWN"
What do you call a rapper who LOVES math?
MC Squared.
Stephen Hawking tried to crack Abutu.
Q. What's the difference between my phone battery and an anti-vax kid?
A. Nothing, they both die at ten.
Steven Hawking lost the Wi-Fi connection on March 14, 2018.
Your momma's so fat, she had to take a selfie using the Hubble telescope.
Science flies you to the moon, but religion flies you into skyscrapers.
What were Stephen Hawking's last words?
*Windows turning off*
Guys, I guess with all these storms there was a power cut in his house.