Science jokes
"Actions speak louder than words."
This doesn't apply to Stephen Hawking, however...
What's a zig zag and made of wood?
Stephen's coffin.
Do atoms eat booty? No, because they are too cool. ;)
Stephen's not dead; his WiFi is slow.
Why do basketball players hate gravity?
Because it's always bringing them down.
What was Stephen Hawking's favorite toy as a child?
Hot Wheels.
What do you get when you cross a cow with a fish? A genetically unstable animal that is impossible and would die instantly upon existing. If it could live, it would be a deformed, parasitic tumor that undulates through people.
An assassin threatens a planet.
The planet remains calm.
The assassin: "Do you not realize the gravity of this situation?"
What did the substrate say to the active site?
"C'mon baby, we fit together, open my door lock to f**kin' key."
Why is the sun lit?
Because it has much solar.
What do you call a bald science teacher?
HOBBS LOL XD :)
What did the cell say when it was dividing?
"It's not you, it's me."
What do you call Stephen Hawking on fire?
Hot Wheels.
What are the similarities between Stephen Hawking and a bull?
They both charge.
What's Stephen Hawking called on fire?
Hot Wheels :)
How can you tell an anti-vaccine kid?
It's only got 10 hours to live.
Why did Stephen Hawking and his wife stop playing hide and seek? She kept using a metal detector.
How does an apple fall from a tree?
I don't know, ask Sir Isaac Newton!
How did Stephen Hawking die? He lost Wi-Fi.
What do you call frozen web?
A web-cicle.