Science

Science Jokes

Scientist

Two scientists walk into a bar. The first one asks for a glass of H2O. The second one asks for a glass of H2O, too. The second one dies. Why?

Pear

Why is Newton not allowed to visit local farms?

The owners know that forces come in pears.

Girlfriend

I took my girlfriend to the beach and a marine biologist thought she was a beluga whale!

Tomato

Why are tomatoes red? Because they contain the carotenoid lycopene!

XD RawR woof woof bark bark UwU meowwwww ROFL LMAO LOLOLOOLOLOL KEKW KEKW PEPELASUGH

Gas

What happens if you inhale too much nitrous oxide (laughing gas)?

You die of laughter.

Banana

It turns out a major new study recently found that humans eat more bananas than monkeys. It's true.

I can't remember the last time I ate a monkey.

Atom

Why don’t scientists trust atoms?

Because they make up everything.

Anus

So, Dad is teaching his 8-year-old son about the planets and said, "This is Uranus." Then the 5-year-old son says, "Where is my anus?"

Earth

I'm no astronomer, but I’m pretty sure the Earth revolves around the sun... not you.

Life

In my science class we were watching a video, and for no reason at all, it started talking about Black Lives Matter, and my friend leaned over and whispered, β€œWhite lives matter more!”

Hairline

Your hairline's so far back even Bill Nye the Science Guy couldn't use photosynthesis to fix it.

Sock

Steven Hawking was so excited for Christmas till he realized he got socks.