Science jokes
What is the difference between Sir Isaac Newton and the baby I just stabbed?
Sir Isaac Newton died a virgin.
I tried to catch fog, but sadly, I missed.
Why did Stephen Hawking die?
He drove too far away from the wall.
How many people does it take to change a lightbulb underwater? The results are shocking!
What does the cell ride to work?
A vesicle.
Stephen is lucky he doesn’t need a vibrator.
He’s got himself.
Did you walk up Stephen Hawking's drive?
Don’t worry, he didn’t either.
Why is Earth flat?
When an asteroid is coming to kill us all:
98.9% of the population: OMG, we're all gonna die!
1% of the population: Eh... I never had any friends anyway.
Alia: ROLL THE INTRO!
What's Stephen Hawking's favorite drug?
Battery acid.
Somebody told me a chemistry joke. I thought it was sodium funny, I slapped my neon that one.
God took away Stephen Hawking's privileges.
Yo mama so tall!!! When she wakes up from her bed, she stands up and finds NASA beside her face, and she thinks it's a fly!!!
Yo mama so fat! When she jumps into a pool, NASA found water on Mars!
What does NASA mean? No Apes Submit Astronauts.
Two men walked into a bar, and one man asked for H20, and the other man asked for H20 too.
Only one man came out alive.
What’s the best math equation to eat?
Cosine Law.
Yo mama is so stupid that she thought NASA is a gaming program!
What does e equal?
I don’t know, a bunch of random numbers, but e=mc2.
Why is the Moon red today?
The reason why the Moon takes on a reddish color during totality is a phenomenon called Rayleigh scattering. It is the same mechanism responsible for causing colorful sunrises and sunsets, and for the sky to look blue.