School jokes

Why did the school shooter earn extra points?

Because he was on a kill streak.

In Denver, the members of a Sunday-school class were asked to set down their favorite biblical truths.

One youngster laboriously printed: “Do one to others as others do one to you.” —Lee Olson, The Denver Post

I got in trouble at school today because I played the knife game with a pair of scissors, but I couldn't flip them off because I was missing that finger.

There's a disabled kid in my class, right? Oops, should've brought my Hot Wheels tracks.

I like my girlfriend's new secondary school uniform, I guess, but doesn’t beat her old primary school one. 😀

I was an orphan as a kid, but I have never had a bitch, so I asked this cheerleader to homecoming, and she said, "Mofo, you are only coming to hoco because you need a home to go to!"

What was JFK's favorite school TV show?

BrainPop.

My teacher got so mad at me for making 9/11 jokes, she hit me twice and I said, "Damn, got hit twice!"

Today, a kid in a wheelchair was rolling around the class to get away from this one annoying kid, so I told him, "Brayden, just get up and walk away."

Every second, 1 kid gets diagnosed with homework.

Why aren't orphans scared of getting in trouble at school?

Because they can't call their parents.

Why do most clips for automatic weapons have 32 bullets?

That's usually how many kids are in a classroom.

There's this smart way to sneak a calculator into school. I've heard of it. You take the calculator, put it in a gun magazine, put the magazine in the gun, and bring the gun to school!

What do high school kids and Dow have in common? They both test chemicals.

Why do orphans not like 1st-5th grade teachers?

Because they have a home room.

Why did the girl bring the ladder to school? Because she wanted to go to high school.

On the first day of school, the teacher asked a student, "What are your parent's names?"

The student replied, "My father's name is Laughing and my mother's name is Smiling."

The teacher said, "Are you kidding?"

The student said, "No, Kidding is my brother, I am Joking."

Teacher: We are going to Seville.

Girls: Omg, it's such a beautiful city. I can't wait to explore!

Boys: Ohh oh oh ohhh.

Omg thanks for 1000 likes!

Why don't teachers give orphans homework? Because they can't go home...

A young boy walked up to his dad and asked, "Daddy, why are you banned from coming to elementary school?"

The dad calmly replies, "Because that's how I met your mother."