School

School jokes

Student

Teacher: Stand up if you think you are stupid.

After a while, a student stands up.

Teacher: So you think you are stupid?

Student: No, I'm not stupid. I just felt bad because you were standing by yourself.

Backpack

Muslim child to his mother: "Mom, why is my backpack so heavy?"

Mom: "Allahu Akbar, my son, Allahu Akbar!"

Orphan

Why can’t orphans go on school field trips?

Parent Signature: _______

Number

The worst joke ever.

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 8 9.

Why was 9 thankful to 6? Because 6 8 7 2.

Memes

High-five

People at my school have started to wear Logan Paul merch. I try to give them a high five, but they always leave me hanging.

Bison

What did the bull say to his son when he was going to school? "Bison!"

Kid

Teacher: Hey Timmy (the quiet kid), what comes after X?

The quiet kid: Splosion.

Teacher: What comes after A?

The quiet kid: AK-47.

Teacher: Faints.

Bus Driver

(Bus Driver) What did you learn in school today?

(Kid) We learned that you are a sussy baka.

(Bus Driver) Oh yeah? Well, I quit!

(Kid) Quit what?

(Bus Driver) Living.

(Kid) But it was a joke!

(Bus Driver) Doesn't matter. I will die, but you will still be alive.

(Kid) Ok.

(Bus Driver) That was a joke, too!

Steel

What is harder than steel?

Michael Jackson on a primary school oval. 😂

Feminist

What is the difference between a school bully and a feminist?

The school bully does not hide behind their computer screen.

Allergy

There is a kid in my class who is allergic to peanuts. He says he's gay. He can't be though... he's allergic to nuts!

School Shooter

When the school shooter is gonna clap the football team but his AK jams: “Take it easy guys, I was just joking!”

Plagiarism

I had to write an essay about Africa, and I failed because I plagiarized the Hunger Games script.

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  • Friend

    I was crying at school and telling my friends that my grandpa died. Then I told them I still remember his last words. They wanted to hear them. They are: "you still holding the ladder?"

    Song

    What song do you think was playing at the school?

    "Pumped Up Kicks"

    Pedophile

    What's the similarity between pedophiles and school shooters?

    They both shoot when they see kids.

    Bullying

    One day at school, I made fun of a girl who lost her hair from cancer, and my parents made me shave my head.

    The next day at school, I made fun of an orphan.

    Skirt

    She wears short skirts, I wear t-shirts, and we're both getting sent home from school because it's distracting to boys, apparently.