School jokes

I went fishing with my grandpa, and my fishing line caught the attention of a school of fish. I told him to get my gun.

A black man said, "Where are the young ones?"

I'm taking a guitar lesson at school. My band instructor told me he was going to hit me with my guitar. I asked him if that was a fret.

Why was the Cheetah not allowed to do tests?

Because it always cheated.

One day Little Johnny's class is having an English lesson. The teacher asks them, "Who can use the word intelligent in a sentence?" Little Mary says, "The teacher is very intelligent." The teacher asks them, "Who can use the word fashionable in a sentence?" Little Suzie says, "They are very fashionable." The teacher says, "Johnny, why don't you have a go? Use the word dictate in a sentence." Johnny thinks for a moment and then says, "Last night I heard Daddy asking Mommy 'Darling how does my dictate'"

A young teen was walking home from school and having a nice day.

She gets home, eats, showers, and heads to her room. The young teen hears her mother say something. Not sure what she said, the girl replies with "ok."

The young teen was gonna head to bed, wondering when her mom was gonna come in and say goodnight. She lays in bed, but then she hears her mom's voice say, "Hunny, I'm home." She doesn't bother to say ok.

Later, when she decides to sleep, she gets a message from her mom saying to unlock the door, that she lost her keys. :)

You're so ugly when your mom dropped you off at school, she got a fine for littering.

What do the Twin Towers and school have in common?

People jumped off a building to escape it.

What do a bag of chips and a gun have in common?

When you pull either one out in class, everyone all of a sudden wants to be your friend...

Why don't orphans do homework?

They don't have a home to do it in.

Why did the students eat their homework?

Because the teacher told them it was a piece of cake!

Teachers: Do you give your mother that attitude?

Orphan: ...

I think it was wrong for that school shooter to end his life at the scene.

He could have done some good by becoming some lonely lifer's bottom.

I fell in love with my teacher.

Which is weird because I am home schooled.

Why do American guns only have 30 bullets?

'Cause that's how many kids are in a class.

When the school shooter gives the autistic kid a glock and he shoots himself, thinking it’s a cigarette.

Your mama is so fat. Her high school picture is an aerial photograph.

So, this kid told me what high school he was going to and asked me if I thought he would make it in.

I said, "No, they don't have double doors."

How do bees go to school?

They go on a buzzzzzzzzzzz.

Two twins were talking in class. I threw a paper airplane at one of them.

What did Osama get on his test when he was a kid? A 9/11.