School jokes
When Sally was little, she came home from school and said to her mother, "Mom, I can't believe it! Little John collects Pimmel at school."
Mom: "No?"
"Like in heaven?" said the mother.
"No, juice," Sally said.
Why do you need an AR-15?
So my son can use it if he's being bullied at school.
The quiet kid, orphan, and school shooter walked into a bar, and he ordered a beer.
What do you call a bus full of stoners?
The Magic School Bus.
They're teaching my 1st grader pronouns! Today it was he/she/they. Tomorrow, you/are/is!
always happens to me
I hate "the woke" so much, I got mad when my mom said I "woke" up late for school.
I pulled my kid out of school after a woke teacher taught my six-year-old about pronouns! Yesterday, it was "he/she," today, "they/it," tomorrow, "I/you/we!"
When you were late to school and your teacher called you tardy, she meant that in more ways than one.
What did Rengoku say to his class?
"Set your school ablaze!"
What did Osama get on his test when he was a kid? A 9/11.
Why did Sally not come home from school today?
Because she got hit by a bus.
Why did Sally not come home from school today?
Because she died by a flying brick!
Back the halls with gasoline, la la la la la.
Light a match and watch it gleam, la la la la la.
My school is burnt into ashes, fa la la la la, la la la la.
Why was the rapper always late?
Because he had to drop his kids off at the Rhyme Bus.
Why did the rapper become an archaeologist?
Because he wanted to dig for old-school beats!
Kris is so dumb that his smartwatch went to NIGHT SCHOOL.
Little Jim's friend told him that if he farts, he will give him a tenner. Little Jim tries to fart, but he poos himself, and he is bullied until he puts the poo on the bullies' face.
What do birds use to check their grades?
Air-ies...
Person A: Hey, what's the next subject?
Person B: Let me check.
Person B: It's greenglish!
Why can’t orphans go on field trips?
They need a parent's signature.