Why does the emo kid skip class?
Pro lifers: End abortion!!!
Pro lifers after school shooting: But not this abortion.
We were watching a 9/11 documentary in class.
I started playing the Angry Birds theme song. That didn't fly well with people, the teacher yelled at me like a bomb, and I landed on the ground.
What do you call a teacher who never farts in public? A private tutor.
Your forehead is so big that the teachers used it as a whiteboard.
The orphan can’t play soccer because he doesn’t know where home is, and his school is too dumb to learn.
Your hairline so bad that when your teacher puts you to sit in the front of the class, your hairline be all the way in the back.
Why can't you do a Math test in the zoo?
Because there are too many Cheetahs!
Not to brag, but I defeated our local chess champion in less than five moves.
Finally my high school karate lessons came to some use.
What does the school shooter do after he shoots a victim? He shoots more kids in them!
I barged into a Halloween party at my school with my air-soft AR-15!
I was so scary, EVERYONE ran away!
True story: my math teacher Mr. Ueberoth accidentally marked a Kahoot as 100 points in Google Classroom instead of 10. If he doesn't find out, the grades will be more hyperinflated than Zimbabwe's economy.
Why did the students eat their homework?
Because the teacher told them it was a piece of cake!
How do you get into Hogwarts? Through the Dumble Door.
300? You are a 3.0.
I went to the store because I had to go to school to run up downstairs because my phone started calling me because I was playing Mario Kart on my kitchen sink's baby grandma, like if you cry every time.
Her (DYM 101).
Why is there a middle school?
Because the kids that go there are middle class families.
Does anyone go to Eagle High School? Tell me what classes you have from 1st period to 4th period if you go to Eagle High School.
I asked my teacher if I needed to be in the special ED class, but she said I don’t eat enough vegetables.
