I had a disability where I kept pronouncing my "g" as an "r", so one day, I said I liked grapes. Of course, I pronounced it "I like rapes." I was kicked out of preschool.
School Jokes
Why was the kid's report card all wet?
Because it was below "sea" level.
What's braver than coming out gay? Taking a shit in an elementary school bathroom with those two kids that always mess with you and turn off the lights.
I pushed my best friend's chair in class. Now I kinda feel bad that he was in a wheelchair.
So, a man walks past a gun store and sees all the guns are half price. Then the man says, "Wow, school supplies are low this week."
Little Jonny just came back from quarantine with his girlfriend, Sally.
They both said they had to go to the bathroom. When they came back, Sally was coughing up a storm. The teacher said, "You need to be quarantined again."
"No," Sally said, "I was just in the bathroom choking on something that grown-ups, especially women, like." Then the teacher faints.
Why was the Cheetah not allowed to do tests?
Because it always cheated.
Why did the cheetah go to school?
To be a cheetah.
Little Johnny is in class one day, and little Timmy starts laughing. The teacher says, "What's so funny?" He said, "I can see your bra strap." The teacher says, "Don't come back to class for a week," so he gets up and walks out. A few minutes later, little Billy starts laughing, and she asks, "What's funny now?" Little Billy said, "I can see both of your bra straps." The teacher says, "Get out of my classroom for a month." So little Billy got pissed, he walked out and slammed the door. This scared the teacher, and she dropped the chalk. She picked it up, then she stood back up, and she sees little Johnny walking out of the classroom. She asked, "Where do you think you're going?" He said, "Well, teach, after what I saw, I'm done with school for a lifetime."
When a woman decides to abort, it is called a decision, but when I run my truck into a playground of kids, it is called murder.
I wrote down a speech at home yesterday.
When I got to school, I was speechless.
Here’s another joke my friend told me.
What did the school shooter do when the librarian told him to be quiet? Pulled out a silencer.
What do you call a kid on the track team who isn't on the track team?
A school shooter.
What do you call a white kid at the back of class?
A school shooter.
What do you call a party planned by Bill Cosby and Jeffrey Epstein?
A high school pill party.
What did the science textbook say to the math textbook?
You've got a lot of problems!
Anyone else think High School Musical would have been a better film with a school shooter?
What do you get when you have a class of kids and a speeding car?
A 24 killstreak!
I asked the emo at my school if he got jealous when his phone died.
Why would you shoot up an innocent school... if your aimbot's dead and you can't commit headshots only?
