Say jokes

What did the cowboy say to the girl on the beach?

"Sandy cheeks."

Two cannibals have just captured a man and are about to eat him, so they cook him and lay him on a table. The first cannibal says, "You start at the bottom, I start at the top," so they both chow down.

About half an hour later, the second cannibal says, "I'm having a ball!" Then the first cannibal says, "Then you're eating too fast!"

So, a man finds a woman on a train track while he's on his way to a bar, and they had a lot of sex.

When he gets to the bar, he brags about the different sex positions they used, and one of the guys says, "Oh, did you do head?"

He responded with, "No, I couldn't find the head."

They say they'll stay, but I left first.

John and Chloe are in school arguing about who has the more heroic grandfather.

Chloe says, "My grandfather killed 50 Nazis, he's so heroic!"

John says, "So what? My grandfather KILLED Hitler!"

A son tells his father, "I have an imaginary girlfriend."

The father sighs and says, "You know, you could do better."

"Thanks Dad," the son says.

The father shakes his head and goes, "I was talking to your girlfriend."

What did Trump say to Epstein? "I like my tea like I like my teens: warm, sweet, and freshly made."

A pair of cows were talking in the field. One says, "Have you heard about the mad cow disease that's going around?"

"Yeah," the other cow says. "Makes me glad I'm a penguin."

What did the two crewmates say when they were hanging on a rope? Polus up!

when you see a depressed kid, you walk up and say "wassup my lil barcode"

I work as an IT technician. The other day, I had to fix Cristiano Ronaldo’s laptop. He pointed to a message on the screen saying, “Do you consent to cookies?” He said that he doesn’t eat cookies and doesn’t know what consent means, so that’s why he called me.

What does a cow say? Moo.

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor?

"Where's my tractor?!"

What did one orphan say to another orphan?

"Get in the batmobile, Robin!"

When a cookie 🍪 wins a race, what will the crowd say?

“Chip Chip Hooray!”

What did the cow say to its udders? "Hi."

What did the plane say to the tower?

"Give me a kiss."

Next time you see a Brit, go up to them and say:

"Imagine losing a 'Tea Party in Boston.'"

My math teacher asked me what a liked term was. I told her I couldn't say, never experienced it.

What do you not say to an Emo if you want them to come round? "Wanna hang out."