Say jokes

What did the rapper say to his microwave?

"Yo, heat it up, fam!"

What did the tree say when spring finally arrived?

"What a re-leaf."

What did the lettuce say when she is popping the champagne?

What does your mom say when she is working?

Nothing, it's rude to talk with your mouth full.

Palestinians leave without saying goodbye.

Israel says goodbye when the Americans say so.

If a black person calls you a cracker, let them say it. You can say things they can't say, like, "Thanks for the warning, officer!"

White people can't say the N-word, but at least they can say, "Thanks for the warning, officer," and "Hi, Dad."

Yo mama so ugly, she has a sign in her garden saying, “Beware of the dog!”

A man wakes up and asks his wife, “Are you okay? You were cursing me all night in your sleep.” The wife replies, “Who says I was sleeping?”

What did the beat say to the rapper?

"You've got me DROPPING like it's HOT!"

What did the rapper say to the broken vending machine?

"Yo, drop the BEAT!"

What did the rapper say to the microphone?

"You're my closet confidant!"

What did the rapper say when he broke his mic?

"Looks like I dropped the mic... literally!"

I’d say Leo is as sharp as a marble, but that would be an insult to marbles.

What'd the farmer say when a coyote killed and ate his rooster?

"No, you ate my cock!"

What did the rapper say when he lost his voice?

"I guess I'll have to drop a SILENT TRACK!"

What did the beat say to the rapper?

"You're off rhythm, but I'll give you a hand!"

Q. What did the United Healthcare CEO say after he got shot? A. I don't know. I don't own a Ouija board.

Say what you want about Jeffery Dahmer, but he always managed to get a head.

What did the rapper say to his BROKEN PENCIL?

"You broke the beat!"