Say jokes

What is the most noise that comes out of a ladies mouth? Nothing because they never have anything important to say.

Knock knock. Who's there? Parents. Parents who? That's what an orphan would say.

What did the fish say when he ran into a wall? (Dam!)

If there is a guy in a wheelchair and he is a bully, say, "I’m still standing."

When someone says you're adopted, say, "But you're still at the orphanage."

I just wanted to say to never let go of family; they are everything. Never let anyone walk all over you. And if you are with me, like this quote.

A blind kid accidentally touches the emo kid's wrist and says, "I'm not reading all of that!"

Be careful what you say around Indians, the red dot means they're recording.

BTW, I am one, wahahaa!

Jimmy does stand up comedy. He says, "What do you call an orangutan?"

Jake replies, "YOU!" Then everyone, including the teacher, laughs. Jimmy cries.

LOL

I'm at my happiest point in life. I'm dating someone that's autistic, and I was just saying I needed someone special in my life.

A note for My arts/health teacher:

oh ms aziz, you've got no rizz, all she do is screams, whether u like it or not, she thinks this makes her hot, she thinks this makes her pop but it just makes me want to crack her head from the top, until she says STOP, and down on the ground she goes plop... and her screaming has finally stopped, and my plan hasn't flopped thus far.... plan B is ram her with my car, fill her shoes with tar, and the prahnas i'll set on her go RAWR... she don't know what she coming for.

Be careful what you say around Indians, the red dot means they're recording.

I read a sign. What it meant to say is, "You matter, don't give up." What I read was, "You don't matter, give up."

What did the doctor say to the terminally ill Power Ranger?

It's Morphine Time.

I was gonna say when you were born your mum saw you and screamed, but I remembered you were adopted...

Two hunters are out in the woods when one of them collapses. He doesn’t seem to be breathing, and his eyes are glazed.

The other guy whips out his phone and calls the emergency services. He gasps, "My friend is dead! What can I do?"

The operator says, "Calm down. I can help. First, let’s make sure he’s dead."

There is a silence, then a shot is heard. Back on the phone, the guy says, "OK, now what?"

What do Orphans say on Father's Day?

Well, not "Happy Father's Day."

What did the hijackers say when they crashed into the Twin Towers?

"Jenga!"

What did the moose say after leaving the gay bar?

"Man, I blew 50 bucks in there."

A woman gets on a bus with her baby. The bus driver says: "That’s the ugliest baby that I’ve ever seen. Ugh!" The woman goes to the rear of the bus and sits down, fuming. She says to a man next to her: "The driver just insulted me!" The man says: "You go right up there and tell him off – go ahead, I’ll hold your monkey for you."