Say jokes
What did the green grape say to the purple one?
"Calm down and take a breath."
Your mama's so fat that she can’t even talk, even if Kevin says, "Oh my gosh!" 'cause she has a big ass mouth.
What do you say when your pet pig gets lost?
This is a pig problem!
"There is no way you can fit in there."
"Says who?"
"Your mom."
"When?"
"Last night."
"OHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH-"
Why did Adele cross the road?
To say hello from the other side.
(Omg omg literally dislike I'm so cringe!)
When the school shooter says to get on the ground, but the sped kid thinks it's Simon Says!
What did the planes say when they were smashing or passing the Twin Towers?
Smash.
(Get it?) 9/11.
Me when my girlfriend comes home, I check her phone and there are 100 texts from a different guy asking her out, and her text says yes.
Get the whip, you're out!
One day my dog died because we couldn't find him. Then we got a cat on the same day. Then my cat went missing, and when I was crying, we heard our Asian neighbor was having a party. Then we went over and I saw my dog and cat on the grill, and they ate them in front of me, saying "yum yum doggy in my tummy and cat in my tummy as well."
When the North Tower saw the South Tower collapse, he would say, "I'm still standing."
When the South Tower saw the North Tower collapse, he said, "I'm still standing."
"UwU my balls says mommy."
"Wait, what?" says Jonny. "That's not my mommy!"
What does one orphan say to another orphan on Opposite Day? "Do you want to go home?"
Why do high tides come up so high?
Because they come up to say hi.
What did the Asian parents say when they had a disabled kid?
Sum ting wong.
I’m trying to find out what IDK means. Every time I ask someone, they say, "I don’t know."
What did the Twin Towers say when they saw the airplane?
Batter up!
When my bro says "YOUR MOM" when I'm talking when I'm at school, and my friend says "YOUR MOM," me punches him;-;
Do y'all know the saying "Hang in there?" Well, fuck that, because I might as well be hanging myself.
What did the Indian say when he bumped into someone else?
"Sari."