Said jokes

Someone asked the former 2016 presidential candidate Hillary Clinton why she lost the 2016 presidential election to Donald John Trump, and the former 2016 presidential candidate Hillary Clinton said, "Because someone asked her what she would do for a Klondike Bar?"

My friend's dad died during 9/11. He was such a good pilot, but my friend kept disturbing him, so when his dad died, he said, "It was you who killed me" (to the child).

So the child said, "Yoo-hoo? What type of name is Yoo-hoo, but Yoo-hoo, Yoo-hoo come here, I need to kill you NOW."

POV: An Asian kidnapper kidnapped an Asian kid, and the kidnapper called the kid's mom. Then the mom said, "No, it's fine, my kid got a B, he failed." And the kidnapper let him go saying he doesn't need a failure.

I told my wife I needed a blood transfusion when I could not remember. She said, "Be positive too."

Bad, I am now a ghost writing this.

Yesterday, I saw an advert with a random woman dancing, and someone said that they were beautiful.

And then I said, "Except the fat people." And then I got sent to my room for saying that.

Yo mama so fat, when she went on the weighing scale, it said "to be continued."

One dog said to the other dog, "Man, it is hard sleeping on the floor."

The other said, "Really? I like my bed."

So, a guy and his brother were walking in the woods, and his brother said, "It's getting dark out here, can we go home?"

The man said, "I know, think how I will feel walking home tonight!"

This is about Gwen.

I don't know her, but people are just causing too much drama over one person who never said one thing to them.

A mouse said, "Who should put the bell on the cat?" Then all mice said, "The old one."

"Hi Koko, you said we met a few years ago. What is your real name? Lol."

People have houses, but I don't have a house because I don't have parents, said the orphan.

"Meow, meow, I'm a dog," said the sped kid.

I said to the orphan, "Do you want me to take you to your family? Oh wait..."

A butt saw the toilet and said, "Shit, I'm sick!"

I’m back and have a joke my friend said!

Person 1: My brother's Halloween costume is so ugly.

Person 2: What was it?

Person 1: He went as himself.

Guys talk to me is what the emo loner said, but seriously, talk to me.

Yo mom is so fat when she went to sit on the couch it said, "To be continued."

My pansexual son was asked to form a sentence with a word "Carry" on his zoom class earlier on today and he said "Pessi was carried by Iniesta and Neymar to his Mickey Mouse UCL". He received a standing ovation. Children are our hope and I'm proud of the education system!

Your so fat, my sister said. I said, "So at least I ain't fatter than your momma."