Don’t have phone sex without protection, you might get hearing aids!
Why do I carry pepper spray? JUST IN CASE OF AS-SAULT.
How did the blind Catholic get in a car crash? He asked Jesus to take the wheel.
Where do pedophiles go hunting .... Elementary schools
Say what you want against pedophiles, but they slow down in school zones.
5 out of 6 scientists say Russian Roulette is safe.
There was a blackout in my neighborhood last night. The police told us to stay inside until they shot him.
A physicist, an engineer and a programmer were in a car driving over a steep alpine pass when the brakes failed. The car was getting faster and faster, they were struggling to get round the corners and once or twice only the feeble crash barrier saved them from crashing down the side of the mountain. They were sure they were all going to die, when suddenly they spotted an escape lane. They pulled into the escape lane, and came safely to a halt.
The physicist said, "We need to model the friction in the brake pads and the resultant temperature rise, see if we can work out why they failed."
The engineer said, "I think I've got a few spanners in the back. I'll take a look and see if I can work out what's wrong."
The programmer said, "Why don't we get going again and see if it's reproducible?"
Whenever I have a one night stand I always use protection
A fake name and fake phone number.
