I was sad, so I called the depression hotline. Turns out the depression hotline is where people roast you until you are depressed.
Sadness Jokes
When I saw a girl sitting on the ground crying, I asked her where her parents were. She cried louder. That’s why I like to volunteer in an orphanage.
The depressed kid went to high five the tree... but the tree left them hanging.
Today my idiot brother screamed, "Ahhhhh, I'm dead!" But it wasn't really, so I decided to make it a reality until my sister came...
AND HELPED ME! - for once, but then two minutes later my mom showed up. We killed him right in front of her, and she screamed! "Donuts and pizza for you and more if you go to Mrs. Roberts' house and say hi and bye to Daddy!!!!!" And she hands us both a sharp tool, and I say, "What about Tommy??!!! Aren't you MAD!!!!!!!" Then she replied, "Who's THAT!!??? Coz he ain't mine. His name is Tommy, Tommy Roberts."
So then me and my sister visit Mrs. Roberts, and she said, "Oh, this isn't anything important. Go home!" So then my sister and I say hi! and do a countdown. After that my Nike white jumper had turned red! IT WAS A MUCH BETTER COLOUR, MUM SEEMED TO APROVE AS WELL! 😊😊😊 But then the police question us where daddy was, so then Mom said....................... oh he's moved on! So then the police officer was like, "Ahem, ma'm where!" SO THEN I BELLOWED.......................... UP - UR -A##. And we got let off the hook, then we moved oh and we k!lled the cop 2 and oh did i meantion we HAD a maid, and a landlord and a cat but they were all 2 annoying so we got rid of them and now our new backyard is very smellyyy and i dont think there is enoff space to put muummy anymore so now i dont think sissy will fit either🧐 i will ask my neibour nessy she'll obviously say YES or ill........................................
ok like for part two☺☺☺
Why are short people sad?
Don't judge though, it's crap but...
Because they couldn't reach happiness.
Orphans are human, too! They just don't know who their parents are or where! I know four sisters named Mariah, Kariah, Lariah, and Iariah and they said they are orphans, too! And they are sad and they don't like your jokes!
How do you get your grass to cut itself?
Make it depressed.
Question: What happened to the depressed kid who tried to high five a tree?
Answer: He was left hanging.
My grandpa died to ligma :(
LIGMA BALLS!
Friend 1: How come when you say "apart" your lips move apart, but when you say "together" they move apart?
Me: Maybe your lips want a divorce.
Everything I fall in love with leaves me. Maybe if I fall in love with my depression, it'll leave me too.
Sad life goes, joke mom.
What's an orphan's favorite football game?? The homecoming.
I cried when my dad was chopping onions. Onions was a good dog.
Why was the clown sad?
He broke his funny bone. PS: "funny bone" is not actually a bone.
F is for friends who don't talk to you.
U is for Ur alone.
N is for never having any plans at all, all you do is sit at home.
What does the dead man say to the other? He says, "Your daughter is pretty."
The other man says, "How do you know?"
The other man says, "Because she is dead."
You can't be short and depressed because you are compressed.
Why did the depressed kid jump off the bike? It was free depressed day.
Why does a robot malfunction when they get sad?
Because they have a break down.
