Room jokes

What is a definition of tight?

A. Putting a blind man in a round room and saying, "Your dinner's in the corner."

A man had 10 dead and bloody babies in the middle of his living room. The police suddenly knocked on his door. What is the hardest thing to hide?

- A boner.

Chuck Norris has a bear rug in his living room. It's not dead or anything, it's just too scared to move.

The teacher asked her class to use "definitely" in a sentence. Little Johnny raised his hand to answer, yet the teacher passed him and went on to Kevin. "The sky is definitely blue." "Very good Kevin, but the sky can also be blue or black," the teacher replied.

Little Johnny raised his hand again as high as he could, yet the teacher passed right over him and picked Annie from the back of the room. "The grass is definitely green." "Very good Annie, but it can also be brown." Little Johnny was waving his hand like crazy seeking her attention. Finally, she called on him. "Mine's more of a question, but do farts have lumps in them?" "Why no, Johnny, why would you ask such a question?" She questioned. "Well, if they don't have lumps in them, then I definitely just shit myself."

How many dead babies does it take to paint my room?

It depends how many bullets you have.

Jesus walks into a motel, throws 3 nails on the counter, and says, "Can you put me up for a night?"

A kid walks into the classroom on time.

What do you call Helen Keller in a pitch black, sound proof room?

Unnecessary.

Why did the author go to the emergency room?

His editor told him he needed an appendix removed.

I walked into a room full of men masturbating. They all looked shocked when I didn't stop.

"Son, I found a condom in your room."

"Gee, thanks, Grandpa!"

"Why are you calling me Grandpa?"

"Because I couldn't find it yesterday."