Roast jokes

But when?

When was the last time you could see your whole body in the mirror?

The only reason communism started was because God looked at your face.

Bro, you were born in a local 7-Eleven bathroom.

So you mom call she side when Covin come home?

I am not telling you twice, your mouth stinks, so go burn your house down like a crazy mad woman, and I will call the cops like, "WTH," because you are so fat.

You look like a cow went through puberty, put the milk before the cereal, then ate it with a fork with a little sprinkle of steak.

It must be tiring to put makeup on two faces.

You have two brain cells; one is lost, and the other is out looking for it.

My mum told me to do the dog poo, but I couldn't find you anywhere.

The first time I heard your voice, my foreskin fell off.

Yo mama so fat...

That when she used a jump rope... Every time she jumped caused a giant cataclysm!

You're like a cat, all you do is eat and sleep.

Your mama is so fat, she sunk Atlantis even though it's in the ocean!

Daday, chill, piss. Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

"Bully," omg, that girl is so ugly.

"Me," Wait, what...ever.

You were born on a highway in a car crash, I wonder why.

You are like a thunderstorm; when you go away, like your dad, everyone is happy.

Me: Are you an alien?

Friend: No.

Me: Yeah, because you're too ugly to be one.

I can never get away from my dog, he follows me everywhere. I think you two would be really good friends.