Road jokes
Q: Why did the chicken cross the road?
A: To get the Chinese Daily!
Get it? I don't either--I get the New York Times!
I drove through a school zone and found out you can drag a speed bump 😬.
What is red, green, lies in a ditch, and is covered in cookie crumbs?
...A girl scout that got hit by a car.
Why did the chicken cross the road?
It didn't.
Why does a chicken cross the road?
To poop and pee in the potty!
Who works at IHOP? A girl with one leg.
P1: Why did the chicken cross the road?
P2: To get to the other side DUH?!?
P1: No dumbass, it's to get run over because he has depression, a chronic illness, and his father left him for a good for nothing pimp that doesn’t even give a shit about how he feels. (Kinda like me).
P2: Holy shit are u ok? *Some random eavesdropping fucker dials 911 in a hurry*
Why did the bat cross the road? Because to get to the blood bar.
Why did the telemarketer cross the road?
I don't know.
I don't know either, but I hope there was a car coming.
Why did the child cross the road?
To get to the church.
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
The Priest... Let's go to my office, because I'm totally not a pedophile.
So, I saw two homeless people on the road fighting. I said, "Stop fighting and go home." I guess it was a little insensitive.
Why did Trump's brain cross the road?
Oh wait, there is no other side.
Why did the chicken cross the road? cuz he saw a chic 😉
Kill yourself in any way. I'm killing myself the HIGHway.
What stands on the side of the road and needs a lot of money to buy?
Billboard, did you think I was gonna say street walker?
Why did my foot cross the road?
Because your ass was on the other side.
Why did the Romans build straight roads? So the Pakis (bastards) didn't build corner shops.
Why did the chicken cross the road?
Because he got hit by a car.
Why did the man cross the road?
Because he wanted to. :) :) :)
Why is the chicken that crossed the road a cannibal? Because he went to KFC.
Why did the Dad cross the road?
To get the milk.