Retail jokes
Yo momma is so fat, when she sat on Walmart, she lowered the prices.
The cashier kicked me out because when he asked for 99 cents, I gave him 99 scents.
What’s one store an orphan can’t shop at?
HomeGoods ;)
Why did the baker give the shopper a butt? Because she asked for buns!
When you've seen one shopping center, you've seen a mall.
Where does Stephen Hawking go when he breaks his arm? PC World.
Grocery stores are like IKEA: you have to assemble the food yourself.
Why can't orphans go to Costco?
Because it's a family shop.
"It looks like she went into Claire’s Boutique, fell on a sale rack, and said, ‘I’ll take it!’" — Bianca Del Rio, RuPaul’s Drag Race
One day I seen a little boy walking in the grocery store, so I asked if he was okay, and he said yes. I asked where his parents were, and he said his mom died years ago and his dad is stuck in the milk aisle.
Ebay is so useless. I tried searching up lighters, and all they had was 13,749 matches.
I first saw her in the Walmart picking out your drawers.
Where does Captain Hook buy his hook?
At a second-hand store.
Why do lesbians go to Sports Authority?
Because they don't like Dick's!
Your forehead’s so big it got sponsored by GAP.
eBay is so useless.
I tried to look up lighters and all they had was 13,749 matches.
I can get my grandma 50% off from her groceries by just scanning my wrist.
Police seek clues to explain Walmart.
Walmart (DYM 73).
ASDA.