Religion Jokes

I moved all the bibles to the fiction section because there is no god as said Stephen Hawking in 2011 but in 2018 god said there was no Stephen Hawking

What's the difference between a peanut and a priest?

With a peanut, you have to break the shell open for the nut to come out.

I think God is cool with abortion

After all, he did kill his only son

God died for your sins, so basically if you don't sin then Jesus died for nothing

what's better? nailing jesus or getting nailed? depends on who's sucking.

What does the Bible stand for? Basic Instructions Before Leaving Earth

A priest, a rabbi and a minister walk into a bar. The bartender looks at them and says, “What is this – a joke?”

Stephen Hawking said there is no god. God said there is no Stephen Hawking

looking out for becoming a pilot, can y'all suggest some good mosques?

don't want to learn the landing part though, allah said it's unnecessary.

I heard there was a kidnapping

Don't worry he woke up

In the back of a van

It was his father's

Friend who was a priest

He was just bringing him to church

What would throw between a priest and a nun a bottle of whiskey

So can we agree that Jesus was the first victim of cancel culture?

Why did Jesus create the Devil?

He didn't recognize himself through the time portal.

The Ruler of Varvona wanted a fruitcake but his subjects showed up at his castle with a christian instead. And he said: NO, NO, NO! YOU IMBECILES! NOT THAT KIND OF FRUITCAKE!"

I used to believe everything in the Bible until I tell I read about the Jew giving out the free fish

What did God say when he made the first woman? Where is your dick at?

How do you trick a homophobic heterosexual male that is a roman catholic priest into using the glory hole inside the men's restroom at a gay bar? Tell him that it is a confessional booth