Bull Shit

Bull Shit Jokes

A Chinese moves to the USA after 50 years of living in Shanghai.

He bought a home on a small piece of land.

The friendly American neighbor decides to go across and welcome the new guy.

He goes next door but on his way up the drive-way he sees the Chinese man running around his front yard, chasing about 10 hens.

Not wanting to interrupt these 'Chinese customs', he decides to put the welcome on hold for the day.

Next day he decides to try again, but just as he is about to knock on the front door, he looks through the window and sees him urinate into a glass and then drink it.

Not wanting to interrupt another 'Chinese custom', he decides to put the welcome on hold for yet another day.

A day later he decides to give it one last go, but on his way next door, he sees the neighbour leading a bull down the drive way and then put his left ear next to the bull's butt.

The American dude can't handle this, so he goes up to the Chinese man and says, "Jeez man, what the hell is it with your Chinese customs? I come over to welcome you to the neighborhood and see you running around the yard after hens. The next day you are pissing in a glass and drinking it and then today you have your head so close to that bull's butt, it could just about shit on you."

The Chinese man is very taken back and says, "Sorry sir, you no understand, these no Chinese customs I am doing, these are American Customs."

'What do you mean' says the neighbor, "Those aren't American customs."

"Yes they are, man at travel agent tell me" replied the Chinese man. "He say to become true American, I must learn to chase chicks get piss drunk and listen to bull-shit!"

3

Ever head the saying white people can’t jump?? Well I thinks that’s total bull shit you should have seen us on 9:11

Kariana: Dad and mom, what is this bull? nonsense?!?!

Treon: How did you find that?!

Kariana: It was under the cabnet where you told me to put the streamers. I found these under the cabnet, did she have another sister you didn't tell me about? Now tell the truth, or else!

Petina: Now what have we told you about going it to things that are not yours!

Kariana: I just told you to say the fricking truth now who is Faineni? Were is she? Who is she? What is her date of birth? Why do I have her bra under here and why....IS IT UNDER THE FRICKING CABNET!!!!! ANSWER ME!!!!!!!!!

Treon: We can't!

Kariana: BULL SHIT!!!!!!!!