Relationship jokes
Roses are red, violets are blue, she's only red bc she sucked you.
Why is it that skinny men like fat women?
Because they need warmth in winter, and shade in summer.
Why was the Orphan boy gay?
So he can call someone Daddy.
Which one would be better to fuck, a fat bitch or a skinny bitch?
School Rizz:
You are my exam. I am always thinking about you but never making a move.
Memes
My girlfriend just broke up with me because I held a door for another girl. She said I was cheating, but the girl I helped was in a wheelchair.
She be hubba on my bubba till I gum.
Your sister: You're so ugly.
Me: But we look the same, so who's also ugly?
"Honey, let's not go so deep into the woods, please. I'm starting to get scared."
"It's easy for you to talk. I can go back alone right now!"
What do you call a person with a flip flop?
My dad.
What’s the worst joke ever? Your parents’ relationship.
Four men were asked if they could have something with their cousin for €500.
The first replied: "For 500€? Of course!"
The second said: "I'd do it for free!"
The third replied: "I would even give her 200€!"
The fourth replied: "With my ex? Never!"
Are you a playground? Because I want to put my kids in you.
What’s the best thing about making out with dead girls?
They can’t say no.
I’ll never forget my father’s last words to me just before he died: “Are you sure you fixed the brakes?”
What do Viagra and Disneyland have in common?
They both cause you to stand around for an hour waiting for a two-minute ride.
My mother-in-law would have been on one of the planes that crashed on 9/11.
Had I known in advance, I would have bought her the ticket.
How did Rihanna find out Chris Brown was cheating on her?
She found another woman’s lipstick on his knuckles.
What did Chris Brown say the first time he saw Rihanna?
I’d hit that.
Are you a haunted house? Because I’m going to scream when I’m in you! 😫