Relationship jokes
Why did the doctor turn the orphan down?
Because he is a family doctor.
Why are orphans gay? To call someone "daddy."
Who is the first person an orphan sees? The doctor.
What do my wife and dinner have in common? They are both vegetables.
Where was your mom last night? In the man club?
If my son was a real man, I wouldn't have caught him fucking another man.
Did you hear Biden went to the ER?
He's having a little trouble with his Putin.
My wife told me to hang her the salt, so I beat the shit out of her. My name's Kyle, by the way.
Teacher: Can someone tell me the only living thing that can reproduce without sex?
Little Johnny: "Your wife."
Your dad is gone.
What did the female rapper say when her boyfriend pulled his pants down and exposed his huge balls?
“I like big nuts and I cannot lie!”
Why do orphans love Dom Toretto?
Because "family is everything!"
Why do orphans like to be gay?
So they can call someone "daddy."
Some kid with parents: "Knock, knock."
Orphan: "Who's there?"
Some kid with parents: "Not your parents."
My wife slept with another man and got pregnant. She told me 9 weeks later. I said it's ok and told her let's talk downstairs, so I pushed her down the stairs.
What does a baby computer call his father?
Data!
Bully: My mom says I'm not allowed to burn trash.
Me: (quiet)
Bully: HEY I'M TALKING TO YOU.
Me: Are you talking to yourself? Because I was listening to music until I heard you.
Me: Spell "I cup."
My Friend: I see you pee.
Me: BOII YOU BETTER GIVE MEH SOME PRIVACY IN MY BATH ROOM!!!!
My Friend: Oh hehe O-O
I fell in love with my teacher.
Which is weird because I am home schooled.
The woman said stop, but the man kept going, so the wife just kept fucking.