Relationship jokes
All these oranges, but you're still the one for me.
When you send her a dick pic, but then she sends you one right back...
Your family.
Angus' love life.
I was always told I’m too small to ride, but every girl I’ve been with rated me a 9.5.
Fruit is like ex-wives.
They both look really good hanging from a tree.
My mom's name is Angel, and she is nothing like one!
Especially in bed...
What do you call a cow with three legs?
My ex.
Why did Stephen Hawking's wife get annoyed with him?
He had an affair with Alexa.
You want to hear some marriage jokes?
Don't worry, it's just a couple.
A girl walks up to her friend with sunglasses she missed very much.
She told her, "Hey, long time no see."
Why did Shawn suddenly fly to Mount Everest, leaving behind friends, family, and food?
Someone told him that "Shelby"'s coming 'round the mountain.
I call my girlfriend .05 because she's a bag I blow into when I've had a few drinks.
Ur mom, ohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!
I have no friends :'(
The granddaughter wanted to see granny. She killed herself.
"Are you taco to me? I nacho friend."
Miss Stephen likes sex like she likes kids.
On a desk in pure isolation.
Why did Miss Stephen get divorced? She didn't float, too.
Diabetic wives are like Cillit Bang. Squeeze them a bit and bang! The bed is gone.
Cindy goes up to her dad and says: "Daddy, can I have $100 for a new dress?"
Her dad almost gags and says: "$100! You're only 12, what do you want with such an expensive dress?"
Cindy says: "Well daddy, I'll look really pretty in it and I promise to look after it ..."
Dad gives in and says: "OK, give me a head-job then".
He flops it out and Cindy just get the end in her mouth and goes: "Eeee-yooo - that taste's like shit!"
Dad goes: "Well, your brother wanted to borrow the car this afternoon ..."