Relationship jokes
Me: Joe left today.
Orphan: Who's Joe?
Me: Joe mama!
Jack and Jill went up a hill to smoke weed.
Jack and Jill got high, and Jack ripped Jill's clothes right off her. Then Jill ripped Jack's clothes off. Jack, when they were fully naked, they started to kiss, but Jack stopped. Jill said, "I know you wanna." Jack said, "No," but Jill jumped on that candy stick anyway. Jack gave in to Jill.
Jill got off, then let Jack suck her candy stick. Jill sucked on Jack's candy stick.
Jack took Jill up a hill to have a picnic, but Jack and Jill got drunk. They then Jill unzipped Jack's fly, then said, "You know you want me to."
He said yes, so she took off her dress and bra. Jack took his pants and shirt off too. They both went in the well together and played a game: Jack's candy stick in Jill's candy stick. Next, Jill was sucking Jack's candy stick while Jack licked and sucked her candy stick, then Jill sat on Jack's candy stick while making out.
Why did Steven Hawking die?
His wife changed the WiFi password.
One day Jack and Jill went up a hill. Jack got Jill drunk and horny, then took her to a hotel because Jack wanted to suck and lick her candy stick.
Little Johnny's dad was drunk and told him to grow up, and he said, "STFU, you need to be young, you big-ass bitch!"
Jack and Jill went up a hill so Jill could lick Jack's candystick, but Jill got a surprise when she saw her boyfriend Rik. He got so angry Jack has no candystick no more. Jill went home with a black eye, and Rik got arrested for cutting Jack's candystick.
My dad's the oldest, and when he was young, he shot my grandpa's balls off, but I thought about it. How does my dad have younger brothers?
I broke up with my RBLX gf, and I heard my uncle crying in the other room.
Knock knock. Who’s there? Ur uncle. What? Is ur RBLX gf?
I was at my grandpa's this weekend and I sent my online girlfriend nudes, and when I sent them, my grandpa's phone went off, so he went on his phone, then my girlfriend replied.
My Dad said he got me from the shops, and I remembered what Grandpa said about him.
Having sex with three people is a threesome.
Having sex with four people is a foursome.
Then maybe I am handsome after all...
My boyfriend's sister is mad because I smashed his girl.
Karien: Don't care. You know what you did.
Jalie: I don't know what you mean. I did nothing! I'm telling the truth!
Karien: Sure. So you mean you never texted Oerien last night around 2:00 AM?
Jalie: NO, I NEVER DID THAT!
Karien: Jalie, stop the story telling. You were the one who had my phone yesterday. Just stop.
Gina: Ha! YOU HAVE NOTHING!
Orphan: Yes I do.
Gina: What do you have then?
Orphan: Parents.
Gina: LIAR!
Did you hear that Alicia wrecked her Lexus?
It's really a shame. She had to give her dad 3 months worth of blowjobs before he'd pay for it.
Why do skeletons like having sex with short girls before eating?
They like to bone a petite.
Why can’t orphans go to daughter and dad dance night? They don’t have a dad to go with.
Boy: "My girlfriend didn't dump me, I dumped her..."
Off the nearby cliff.