Imagine Steven hawkings was the real slim shady but could not stand up
The twin towers was basically angry birds but in real life
Aunt: Stop telling the kids Santa isn't real Me: Stop telling them their dad is going to get milk
What's the difference between Kelly Clarkson and a Florida real estate agent?
A Florida real estate agent screws over seniors, Kelly Clarkson screws little children.
i have a stepladder. my real ladder left for milk and never came back.
Ya know, Kobe made a real impact on the earth!
Can't wait to meet you! So join the Depression family! We open real soon! Try best to hold onto sanity!
What's the difference between the real Jesus and a picture of him ?
It only takes one nail to hang up the picture.
“What’s your name, son?” The principal asked his student. The kid replied, “D-d-d-dav-dav-david, sir.” “Do you have a stutter?” the principal asked. The student answered, “No sir, my dad has a stutter but the guy who registered my name was a real jerk.”
A guy goes onto a rooftop bar, and is sitting next to a guy who says he's drinking a magical drink. He asks "What's so magical about it?" the guy drives a car and flies it around the rooftop. the other tries, but falls of and dies.
The bartender shakes his head, and says.
"Y'know, you're a real jerk when you're drunk superman.
Radiohead had to remake Fake Plastic Trees after encountering Carrie Underwood in real life for the first time.
i only cut to find out if im real or cake
This joke includes potentially sensitive content.
If Jesus was real they wouldn’t call it the crucifixion.
They would call it crucifact.
So the other day I was looking up zodiac sign stuff you know im a real big fan of that and I come across this thing and it’s like all zodiac signs have there own hairstyles... except cancer.
What's kobe favorite song. It's going down for real
Real quick, I'm autistic, and if anyone asks, I absolutely love some of these jokes XD I found this while doing some research for a paper.
"What's your name, son?" The principal asked his student. The kid replied, "D-d-d-dav-dav-david, sir." "Do you have a stutter?" the principal asked. The student answered, "No sir, my dad has a stutter but the guy who registered my name was a real jerk."
A man walks into a rooftop bar and takes a seat next to another guy. “What are you drinking?” he asks the guy.
“Super Power Beer,” he says.
“Oh, yeah? I doubt it?”
Then he shows him: He swigs some beer, dives off the roof, and lands with no damage what so ever. He walks back into the bar.
“Amazing!” the man says. “Let me have some!” The man grabs the beer. He drinks it, jumps off the roof —and falls 15 stories to the ground. Splat. The barman says. “You know, you’re a real idiot when you’re drunk, Superman.”
one day I was walking around, then saw this mom mad at her kid and screamed " YoUr AdOpTeD!" he said "yeah I know my REAL mommy is still at home with daddy."
