Real jokes

Me testing if there is fall damage in real life (falls off of a cliff, uses water bucket trick) dies.

Why did the mermaid want to go to the evil monster so it could get a real joke? Ha, ah, ah, ha!

Guy: Fight me on Xbox. Guy: Oh right, you don't have one *laughs*

Me: Fight me in real life. Me: Oh right, you don't have a real life. *INSERTS APPLE BOTTOM JEANS*

2021-2022

You wanna hear a good joke, kiddos?

Gods being real. (Newsflash, all gods are manmade. THEY'RE ALL FICTION!)

This guy went to the gas station to get some gas, and as he asked the cashier for gas he noticed a terrible smell. He asked what the smell was and the cashier replied, "That's your gas, cuz I farted. Now hand me the 20 bucks!"

The guy said, "No, not the kind that comes from your ass, but the kind you put in a car!" The cashier says, "That fart was worth 20 bucks, so beat it!"

Guy says, "I need real gas, nothing about your ass impresses me!" Then another guy gets in line and says, "I know the guy personally, we grew up together. Always trying to be the cool kid in school, bragging about his big horse's ass...no wonder he was always the *butt* of all jokes!"

Kid #1: You're adopted.

Kid #2: At least they wanted me.

Kid #1: Did your real parents want you?

Akeld, just want you to know: Leave me and Gwen alone.

Real me.

Imagine Stephen Hawking was the real Slim Shady but could not stand up.

You know how sometimes you want to listen to music?

But everything you listen to is just supremely unsatisfying, even if it's songs you usually love; they are just so unappealing, and you have no idea what you actually want to listen to.

"Cheesus" hates me, yeah, I know, 'cause he's a real douchelord fictional character.

I went out with this girl the other night. She wore this real slinky number. She especially looked great going down the stairs.

LGBTQ. If there’s any joke, it’s 100% the woke 🤡.

What does Fortnite and real life have in common?

They both lost their tower.

I went to a restaurant and a waiter took my order. She had two black eyes, so I ordered real slow.

Because obviously she doesn’t listen.

In Mario, it is called a Zoomba, but if it was real, it would be a boomba.

What’s the difference between a woman that doesn’t belong in the kitchen and Bigfoot?

Bigfoot is real.

Walking's a chore, let alone crawling.

The real reason Steven Hawking died is he was drunk and tried to go down a flight of stairs.

When I was little, I used to think that the people in cartoons were real people...until I turned 7. I realized that it was just people doing voices. Sad, isn't it?

Russia—the real joke.