Put Jokes

Student: 503 bricks are on a plane. 1 falls off. How many are left?

Teacher: 502.

Student: How do you put an elephant in a fridge?

Teacher:No you can't fit an elephant in a fridge!!

Student: Just open door, put elephant in, close door.

Student: How do you put a giraffe in the fridge?

Teacher: open door,put giraffe in, close door

Student: no! Open door, take elephant out, put giraffe in, close door.

Student: The Lion King is having a B-day party. All the animals are there, except one. Which one? Teacher: let me guess the lion?

Student: No!The giraffe because He's in a fridge.

Teacher: WOW!

Student: Sally has to get across a large river home to many alligators. They are very dangerous, but Sally swims across safely. How?

Teacher: Sally stepped on the alligators mouth?

Student:The gators are at the party.

Student: But Sally dies anyway. Why?

Teacher:She drowned?!

Student: no! She got hit in the head by a flying brick.

Why do you put a baby in a blender feet first?

So you can watch the expression on their face.

What does McDonald's and priest have in common they both put there meet in 10 year old buns

I like my women like I like my microwaves Hot, ready to go when I am, and able to kill any baby I put in her

what song does Saturn sing ?

'if you like it then you should have put a ring on it '

What's worse than eating 5 raw oysters out of your grandmother's vagina?

Realizing you only put in 4.

When Kim jong-un said nuke the chinese, he meant put the take away in the oven. Some simple misunderstandings start a war.

I don’t put ketchup and mustard on my hotdog, I relish it.

How to kill a blond put a scratch & sniff in a pool]

i put someone in a wheelchair in to the fire and called him hot weels

Q: How do you blind a woman? A: You put a windshield in front of her

can i put deez nuts in yo cluts?

A child determined to burn his home down. His dad watched, tears in his eyes. He put his arm across the mother and stated, “That’s arson.”

Why did the boy put the potatoes 🥔 on the kitchen floor?

He wanted to mash potatoes!

If you put a million monkeys at a million keyboards, one of them will eventually write a Java program.

The rest of them will write Perl programs.

How do you put an end to MeToo? Just fill those combined showers with transgender women

What do you you get when you put 2 nuns and a blond on a football field? 2 tight ends and a wide receiver.

The worst thing about an owl is how they can maintain eye contact when you put them in a microwave

What's the difference between a women and a washing machine? The washing machine doesnt follow you after you put a load in it.

Why did the sperm cross the road ———— because I put on the wrong sock today