Put jokes
Why are people mad at me? All I did was tell the truth and put the Bible in the fiction section of the library.
I put a Dalmatian in a washing machine and killed him.
Yo' mama is so stupid, she put a quarter in a parking meter and waited for her gumball.
"My friend and her boyfriend were kissing until she puts her tongue down his throat, and what happens next is really weird."
The tongue gets stuck in his throat and starts to guh-guh-gughhh trying to get her tongue out of his throat, but it cumssssss out with spit all over his tongue, then they break up because he didn't want that to happen ever again...:/
Did you hear about the woman who put her husband’s ashes in a burrito?
He gets to tear that ass up one more time.
Why don't I poop Windex? Because I Pledge to do my doodie!
Put some Windex on it.
My friend said, "Dude, if you don't put your desk in line with the column, you're gay." So he did it, and I said, "Well, I guess now he's straight." ;D
My sister said download "Among Us" on my iPad, so I did. Then she taught me to play. Then she told me a code and told me where to put it, and I typed in the code.
Then she was the imposter, and I was a crewmate, so I was sticking with her, and she killed me when we made it to the medbay.
The way you are so ugly your parents even regret the day you were born.
The way you are so black when your mom is bathing you in the dark, she has to put flour in the water to see you.
🤣🤣🤣
What the can say to the tomato?
Tomato tomato potato potato find twelve recipe for the both 👍🏾
I put on ingredient sticker read for tasting good.
A note for my History Teacher:
Frick frack apple jack tic tac sick sack Mr. Khan and give him a big fat whack 'cause his teaching's got lack, his system I will hack and through the screen I'll give him a smack. I'll throw him on the clothing rack. On his seat I'll put thumb tacks, I'll break his momma's back... and he'll never come back.
All these females swear they loyal... but you can’t put loyalty on a hoe.
Are you a playground? Because I want to put my kids in you.
Why should you put an autistic person in a refrigerator?
Because otherwise you’ll get a rotten vegetable.
(Not meant to be triggering).
There was a car accident, and the cops pull up to the crime scene to start asking people questions. The police started talking to a blonde lady and said, "What happened here?" She responded by saying, "A car crash." They then asked, "But how did it happen?" She responded, "The cars crashed into each other." They finally said, "But why did it happen?" The lady said, "Oh, I know where you're going with this. It happened because when cars push on the gas pedal, the car goes forward, and they both pushed it, so they both went forward and hit each other." One cop said, "Never mind, ma'am," and they started walking away.
The blonde lady then said, "Oh, and officers, my computer froze. Do you think I should put it in the microwave or in the oven?"
What's the difference between a mole and a priest?
One will till your 13 to put hairs on your face.
Did you know that your son has been deeper inside of your wife than you have...unless you put the coat hanger up there?
"Jump in the Cadillac, girl, let's put some miles on it."
I locked Terri Schiavo in the freezer.
Hey, I thought that's where you were supposed to put vegetables!
What do you get when you put a clown, a peodophile, a gay wet person?
Answer: YOUR DAD