When is a door not a door? When it's ajar.
Puns
My dad told me that his dreams were shattered a few years ago.
Then I asked him how many years ago.
He replied with, "When were you born?"
What do you call a mountain of kittens?
A meowtain.
Why was the obtuse angle hot?
It was more than 90 degrees.
What's brown and sounds like a bell?
Dung.
What did the knight say to his younger brother? "Good night."
You expected a silly pun there, didn't you? That's pretty rude. It makes light of the struggles of being a knight. Especially a good knight.
What did one brick say to the other? Never LEGO.
What do you call a cool octopus?
Tenta-cool (tentacle)
Doctor: You need new glasses.
Patient: How'd you know? I haven't even told you what is wrong with me yet.
Doctor: I could tell as soon as you walked in through the window.
What's the difference between dad jokes and bad jokes?
The letter b.
Is it incest if it’s out in the open?
Or is it... outcest?
What do you call a clever clock?
Clockwise.
Why can’t skeletons fight? They don’t have the guts.
"Why don't you want to taco 'bout it?"
"Cause I'm nacho friend anymore."
It's not that the man did not know how to juggle, he just didn't have the balls to do it.
I got a reversible jacket for Christmas, I can't wait to see how it turns out.
Why was the computer so good at golf? Because he had a hard drive.
Once my friend's bakery burned down... His business is toast.
Q: Where do smart hot dogs end up?
A: The honor roll.
I am never letting Elsa take care of my dog again. Last time she just let it go.
