Wii

I asked a French man if he played videogames, and he said, "Wii!"

Internet

Why do bugs hate the internet?

Because they always get caught.

Get it? Inter-net?

Uranus

Uranus, ur-anus, your anus. Anus is what's in between your two buttocks.

Guy

So a guy walks into a bar and asks the bartender for a drink. The bartender says tell me a joke. So the guy says: so a guy walks into a bar and asks the bartender for a drink. The bartender says tell me a joke. So the guy says: so a guy walks into a bar and asks the bartender for a drink. The bartender says tell me a joke. So the guy says: so a guy walks into a bar and he asks the bartender for a drink. So he gives the guy a drink. So he gives the guy a drink. So he gives the guy a drink.

Midget

I was walking by a prison when I saw a midget in an orange jumpsuit climbing down the fence. When he hit the ground and sneered at me, I said, “Well, that’s a little condescending.”

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  • Cow

    A cow is at his friend's house for a sleepover party. Sadly, all of the beds are taken. Where does the cow sleep?

    On the COWch (couch).

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  • Cook

    How many line cooks does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

    Three. One to do it, and two to say that they did it better at the previous restaurant they were at.

    Marijuana

    A depressed man was caught on top of the Empire State Building with marijuana. Needless to say, he didn't want to come down.

    Boat

    When do you know you are getting a good deal on a boat? -- When there's a sail on it.