I want to thank all the sidewalks out there for keeping me off the street
Son : "Dad, Are we pyromaniacs ?" Dad : "Yes, we arson
whats white and rhymes with dre? eminem.
This joke includes potentially sensitive content.
Youāre Russian when you go to the bathroom and Finnish when you come out. What are you in the bathroom?
European
My girlfriend left me because of my obsession with pasta. -- I'm doing well, but I do get cannelloni.
Rainbows TOP the class as they always score with flying colours
Back in Australia, my puns are high koala-tea!
Two wrongs don't make a right, but what do to wrights make? The first airplane.
Why was the man running around his bed?
Because he needed to catch up on his sleep!!
What happens when a skeleton does not laugh at you're pun?
Looks like someones funny bone is brokenš
I have a joke about time travel, but I'm not gonna share it. You guys didn't like it.
A Vampire Stalks you into a field of corn, The stakes have never been higher...
What do you call a cute door?
Adoorable
What did one cell say to his sister when she stepped on his toe? Mitosis!
I've just started a new business making people breathe in large amounts of helium. They all speak very highly of it.
Why did the orange go blind? Cause he was low on vitamin c
How did the hipster drown?
He ice-skated before it was cool.
There was murder. The detective suspected the artist first... because he was sketchy.
I ate a time-machine once, it was very time consuming. Especially when I went back four seconds.
