Puns
What food makes you smart? Salt, because it's a mined food.
What did the store manager say when they ran out of toilet paper?
We’re wiped out!
I am going to scream, this is a cry for help.
Belief in Egyptian gods is just Ra-ng (wrong). 😁
What did the piggy bank say to his piggy friend?
"Ain't you got no cents?"
Piggy: "Actually, no. Just pork."
What do you call a girl with only one leg? Eileen.
What about an Asian girl with only one leg? Irene.
What do you call an Afghan in the bath? A bath bomb.
Why did people bully the burning circuit?
It was too short.
Why did the MOSFET go to jail?
It had a charge for battery.
How did the security guard at the orchid get better at his job? He got an Apple Watch.
My brother wanted to sharpen my pencil. I told him he had a point.
"Racccccccccccccccccccccoccoooocoooocoooooooooooocoooooo this is my song."
I think I gave you the coronavirus because I can't stop staring, a-choo!
My pathological cheater of a sister wanted to play a board game with me.
I turned her down because I didn't like the Risk involved.
I got a job as a pencil sharpener. I would tell you about it, but you wouldn't get the point.
Do you think Mars prefers Sour Orbiters sweet?
Orbiter: "Or bitter?"
Wanna hear a pun?
Welp, I'll punch you with one!
Want to hear a pun?
Well, I'll punch you with one!
Why don't you act like an amoeba and split?
I had some puns about construction, but I'm still working on them.