So, I tell my friend a pun about Bach. She freaks out. Then I say, "I hope that wasn't too much to Handel. Don't let it Strauss you out."
For all of my musicians out there!
What's a depressed person's least favorite type of cereal?
LIFE.
I really want to beat the living daylights out of you but it's not worth getting the wooden spoon for garbage
What do you call chill legumes?
Hippeas
I had a dog with an eating disorder.
He wouldn’t eat any of my homework.
I used to have a skeleton of jokes, now my supply is bone dry. Guess I wasn’t that femurous.
Riddles not jokes.
What has 4 legs but cannot walk?
What has bark but no bite?
There's a one-story house in which everything is orange. Orange walls, orange doors, orange furniture. What color are the stairs?
What has holes but can carry water?
What is in front of you, but cannot be seen?
What is something you have inside you that is pink, but cannot be seen?
What can you catch but not throw?
And last one:
What can rule, but not command?
Tell me the answers in the comments.
Like 90% of this was from this link: https://parade.com/947956/parade/riddles/
One more thing: Don't google it or search it up, use your brain to answer these.
What do you call an athlete who injured 75% of his spine?
A quarterback.
Q: What happens when a pig plays tug-a-war?
A: pulled pork
why was the short person a coward.they didnt stand up to challenges
fish y u no fly. i dont like being caught naked
a texan and a alaskan walk in a room the alaskan says "my state is bigger than yours" the texan says "it won't be when it melts"
Why do nuns walk in groups?
So one “nun” can keep an eye on the other “nun” just to make sure that she isn’t getting "nun".
Why did Spider-Man decide to buy a laptop? So that he could design his own “ website “.
What did the bull say to the bullfighter? What’s the “ matador “.
Why did the man laugh when he only had just one nickel a one penny in his pocket? He had a 6 cents of humor.
Why did the turtle cross the road? To get to the “ shell” station.
What kind of clothing should you wear on “ hump day”? Camelflouge.
I just quit my job at a can crushing factory.
It was soda-pressing.
whats the difference between 5 cocks and a Joke? I can't take I joke
