Power

Power jokes

Steven Hawking

Steven Hawking had dark humor.

Whenever he turned on his laugh effect, it diverted power from his screen brightness.

Government

Why is prostitution illegal?

Because when it comes to screwing people and taking their money, the government doesn't want anyone outperforming them.

Ironman

What's the difference between Ironman and Ironwoman?

One's a superhero, one's a command.

Ant

If you had the strength of an ant, you could lift the pyramid of Giza.

(Ants can lift items 20x their weight.)

Boob

Boobs are like batteries...

AA will get the job done...

C is bigger than AA...

D is bigger that C...

...and if they're square, you don't want to put your tongue on them!

Memes

Sky

Why does the sky think it's so powerful?

Because it's always looking down on us.

Man

There is a man in the hospital. The power went out, and the man was stabbed to death. There are three witnesses: the nurse who was with another patient, the doctor who was reading some paperwork, and The Who who was at the vending machine. Who killed the man?

The mom did, because you can’t use a vending machine when the power's out!

Gun

What do a bag of chips and a gun have in common?

When you pull either one out in class, everyone all of a sudden wants to be your friend...

Yo mama

Yo mama so dumb, she stuck a battery up her butt and said, "I have the power."

Weapon

What is the strongest weapon in India?

The red button (this is a fact).

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  • Dick

    What do you get when you cross a dick and a potato?

    A dictator.

    Chuck Norris

    Chuck Norris heard that nothing in the world could kill him.

    So he tracked down nothing in the world and killed it.

    Kid

    When we were kids, we used to be afraid of the dark.

    But when we grew up, the electricity bill made us afraid of the light!

    White privilege

    Why can black people post offensive jokes about making fun of white people, but white people can't post offensive jokes about making fun of black people? Because white people have white privilege. Does it cycle?

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  • Death

    Stephen Hawking's death was simply an accident. He pressed power off instead of sleep mode.

    Baby

    Did you know about 9 months after a power outage 50% more babies are born because it is dark?