Did you hear about the story of the husband who told his wife she’d look sexier with her hair back?
Apparently, that’s not a nice thing to say to cancer patients.
A young man cracked a joke about dementia to his friend on the bus. The old man sitting next to him politely asked, “Can you stop making jokes about terminal diseases?”
He replied, “Yes, I cancer.” Then he cracked tumor.
EMINEM: His palms are sweaty, knees weak, arms are heavy.
WebMD: Cancer.
With numerous reports of Donald Trump's odor and Kelly Clarkson's lack of hygienic habits... proof that money doesn't buy cleanliness.
Neo-Confederates all claim to be about "heritage" not "hate". Well, if your heritage consists of Kelly Clarkson, riding on siblings, and treating Donald Trump as if he's the second coming, then it really sucks to be you.
What’s worse than George Bush doing 9/11? Jeffrey Epstein doing nine Elevens.
Jokes about ISIS are all about the execution.
What does an Arab prostitute say?
"Bomb my pussy!"
Nothing bad ever happens to the Kennedys! Except that one headshot, but we don’t talk about that.
I couldn't imagine being Abe Lincoln, that would be mind-blowing!
Why can't Americans play chess?
Because they already lost two towers.
What do you get when you cross a dick and a potato?
A dictator.
What do you call a Black-Asian dictator?
Kim Kong Coon.
Q. What do they call an ISIS terrorist who owns both a camel and a goat?
A. Bisexual.
Politics.
The last two presidents of the US.
I don't get why it is called abortion instead of murder.
What do you call a cemetery of dead Arabs? A mine field.
What happens when a furry takes over Nazi Germany?
The Furred Reich.
What do you call an Israeli strike against Gaza?
A Kike Strike!
A Russian walked into a bar... Unlucky for him I guess, in Soviet Russia, you don’t walk into bars. Bars walk into you.
Why can’t U.S.A or England play chess?
Because the U.S.A has no towers, and England doesn’t have a queen.
